My 5 Funniest Videos On The Web Today

1) I want to kick things off with a right old ding-dong between former Arsenal midfielder, Ray Parlour, and Spanish football expert Guillem Balague. Here's the two of them doing battle over whether the Premier League or La Liga is better in one of those completely pointless debates usually reserved for the pub.



2)Now that's enough of the verbal battle, let's move on to the battle on the pitch. The challenge you are about to see isn't very festive but the snowballs that are being thrown at the manager halfway through the clip is a little more festive.



3)Remember the days when we all used to ask eachother how many keepy-uppies we could all do? But we never used to ask eachother how many we done whilst blindfolded. That's because none of us tried it. Here's Tim Cahill, Theo Walcott and Ronaldinho giving it a go.

blindfolded keepie uppie
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4)On to a Mark Hughes video now, and perhaps this one gives us a clue as to why he was sacked. Perhaps if he had been about to persuade JT to sign on the dotted line he'd still be in a job. Not quite sure why he's got a Geordie accent though...



5)And finally, here is a video of this chap getting a touch overexcited behind this plucky reporter. Not as funny as he thinks it is...

Wooooooo! Par-tay! Real Madrid held their annual Christmas dinner along with the Real Madrid basketball team and all the club’s senior executives and as you can see, things got pretty crazy.

Iker Casillas may or may not be asleep with his eyes open, Guti is clearly dying of boredom/thankful Sergio Ramos is too far away to grab his arse, and Sergio Ramos is probably on a phone sex hotline. While wearing a fancy butler’s outfit.

You’ll be happy to know that at least two members of the team have clearly already gotten their Christmas wishes this year…

Cristiano and Kaka sitting together. Together forever . Although, it looks like Cristiano is doing a little flirting while Kaka has his head turned.

My 5 Funniest Videos On The Web Today

1) Here is a clip from Brazil. This goalkeeper has to be given a lot of respet after acting so graciouslly to missing out on a award he was clearlly expecting to win.



2)Ok. Wayne Rooney may play in a red shirt for Manchester United and be a hero to most young kids. But that doesn't give him an excuse to think that he is superman. Shame on you Wayne!


Rooney La Plongeuse - The most popular videos are here

3)What is it with goalkeepers and horrendous tackles. Here is yet another video of a goalkeeper almost taking the head off the poor player. The latest to perform the stunt is CFR Cluj goalkeeper Nuno Claro



4)It's not only the goalkeepers who are taking part in these crazy stunts. The outfield players are starting to have a go. Ouch!



5) Don't we all love Fanzone on SkySports. Here are two fat blokes having a right go at eachother during the Manchester Derby.

Jens Lehman Is Taking The Pee

Stuttgart keeper Jens Lehmann added another chapter in his catalogue of bizarre behaviour by going to the toilet behind his goal while the ball was still in play.

Although im not convinced that was quite the type of exposure the advertisers were hoping for when they paid for that hoarding.

Lehmann even has enough time to shake before racing back onto the pitch to get his angles right to close down a Unirea Urziceni attack.

Perhaps an evening of staring at a team whose name is partially an anagram of urine got a bit too much for Jens.

My 5 Funniest Videos On The Web Today

1) Once again it's Jeff and the boys taking the pee!



2)Hearts captain Michael Stewart makes a complete prat out of himself after kicking out at air, and then landingon his arse. Idiot!



3)Luckily for Stewart, Tomasz Kuszczak was also doing his best to be named most-foolish-looking player of the week.



4)Unfortunatly for Manchester United target, Edin Dzeko, he was on the recieving end of a terrible tackle. Ouch!


Wolfsburg Vs Nürnberg 2-3-Karate Foul an Dzeko...21.11.09 - The funniest bloopers are right here

5)I'm going to finish today with a video of Lionel Messi showing off his skills at the age of......five.......amazing

Just Another Day In Brazil

Some fans take relegation well, with a shrug of the shoulders or a few tears. Not in South America though, where relegation can be greeted with a carnival of violence.

This was the case in Brazil on Sunday, when Coritiba kind of ‘welcomed’ or 'unwelcomed' Fluminense to the Estadio Couto Pereira. The teams drew 1-1, a result that was good enough to save the relegation-threatened visitors but – you guessed it – also consign Coritiba to the second tier of Brazilian football.


So you can understand why Coritiba’s fans were a teensy bit upset with the way things worked out, especially as two Rio-based clubs – Botafago and Fluminense – survived. And by a little bit upset, I mean this:






That’s right, a good old-fashioned South American pitch invasion, which left one policeman unconscious, needing to be airlifted from the stadium by helicopter.

When the dust settles, it will be interesting to see what punishment is meted out to Coritiba for its fans despicable behaviour. In England, this sort of thing might see a club being demoted two divisions, rather than one, but mental pitch invasions seem to be rather more the norm in Brazil.


At the other end of the table, it’s only fair I mention new champions Flamengo, who won their first title in 17 years after a 2-1 win over Gremio. Congrats. Btw, Gremio’s fans will be delighted to have lost that game, as it meant bitter rivals Internacional missed out on the title.


Although this is a very serious situation, there is still time to laugh in many parts of this video so please don't be ashamed to do so.

Jeff Stelling and the gang have a bit of a giggle at this reporter who can’t quite decide whether Celtic striker Andreas Hinkel is not going to pass up a chance or not going to miss it.

In the end he settles for something somewhere in between.

Watch out for the great play on words from Sir Jeff. Genius.




I have no idea what Paul Merson is laughing at. He’s got a very short term memory!

Remember this

Artur Boruc's Monday Rage List

AAAAHHHHHHHH I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS IS A LIST OF THINGS THAT MADE ME ANGRY LAST WEEK:

1. THE WORLD CUP DRAW — AAAHHHHHHH IT TOOK FOREVER!!!!!!!! I ACTUALLY HAD TIME TO KICK MYSELF IN THE HEAD SLIP INTO A COMA AND THEN WAKE UP AND EAT A BRICK OF CHARCOAL ALL BEFORE THEY FINISHED EXPLAINING THE STUPID RULES!!!!!! CHARLIZE THERON LOOKED PRETTY HOT THOUGH!!!!!

2. THE WORLD CUP DRAW PART II — SINCE I COULDN’T GO TO THE WORLD CUP DRAW BECAUSE POLAND DIDN’T QUALIFY I DECIDED TO HAVE MY OWN DRAW!!!!!!! INSTEAD OF PICKING BALLS OUT OF POTS TO DECIDE WHICH NATIONS ARE GROUPED TOGETHER I AM PICKING KNIVES OUT OF A DEEP FRYER TO DECIDE WHAT I THROW AT MY NEIGHBOR’S HOUSE TODAY!!!!! IT’S REALLY A MUCH BETTER SYSTEM!!!!!!

3. CORN — DO YOU KNOW WHAT CAUSES GROUPS OF DEATH AT THE WORLD CUP?!?! CORN!!!!! THAT’S WHAT!!!! GIANT EARS OF CORN DO THEIR VOODOO ON THE BALLS AND ARRANGE THEM IN AN EVIL MANNER!!!!!!! THIS IS A SCIENTIFIC FACT!!!!!!

4. ARSHAVIN’S DEPRESSION — STOP BEING SAD ABOUT MISSING THE WORLD CUP YOU FREAKY LITTLE MUNCHKIN!!!!! YOU DON’T SEE ME MOPING AROUND LIKE A GOOBER BECAUSE POLAND DIDN’T MAKE IT!!!!! JUST VENT YOUR EMOTIONS THROUGH RANDOM ACTS OF BIZARRE VIOLENCE CARRIED OUT ON STREET SIGNS AND PUBLIC TOILETS!!!!!!!

5. JOAN LAPORTA’S EL CLASICO FIESTA — THIS IS NOT HOW YOU PROPERLY CELEBRATE A BIG WIN!!!!!! WHERE ARE THE FLAMETHROWERS AND MARTINI GLASSES FULL OF PAINT THINNER?!?!?!?

6. LUCA TONI’S CALENDAR — AHHHHHHH IT’S SO AWESOME!!!!! BUT IT ANGERS ME BECAUSE I CAN’T LIVE INSIDE IT!!!!! AHHHH I WANT TO LIVE INSIDE THAT CALENDAR!!!!!! TAKE ME WITH YOU LUCA!!!!!!!

7. GROUP OF DEATH — EVERYONE IS SAYING THAT BRAZIL NORTH KOREA THE IVORY COAST AND PORTUGAL ARE THE GROUP OF DEATH BUT I STRONGLY DISAGREE!!!!!! A TRUE GROUP OF DEATH WOULD INCLUDE A GUILLOTINE RAT POISON AND SEVERAL VENEREAL DISEASES!!!!!!! AHHHHH THAT SOUNDS LIKE FUN!!!!!

8. GOALKEEPER HEAD KICK — GOALKEEPERS SHOULD NOT KICK THEIR OPPONENTS IN THE HEAD!!!!! UNLESS THEY REALLY REALLY WANT TO AND THEN IT’S OK!!!!!!

9. MY UNSPEAKABLY AWFUL NEIGHBOR DAN WYKOWSKI — SO I WAS TRYING TO WATCH THE NINE HOUR WORLD CUP DRAW WITHOUT SWALLOWING MY OWN TONGUE WHEN MY PHONE RANG!!!!!! IT WAS DAN AND HE WANTED TO KNOW IF I FOUND HIS DAUGHTER’S DOLL ON MY LAWN!!!!!!! I SCREAMED INTO THE PHONE AND THEN I SAID “NO I HAVEN’T SEEN IT!!!!” EVEN THOUGH I RAN IT OVER SEVERAL TIMES WITH THE LAWNMOWER YESTERDAY!!!!!! HE SAID SHE WASN’T UPSET THAT IT WAS MISSING BUT HE WAS BECAUSE HE JUST BOUGHT IT AND IT WASN’T CHEAP!!!!!! THEN I SAID “AHHHHHH I REALLY DON’T CARE!!!!” AND I HUNG UP BUT I ALREADY MISSED THE DRAW TO DECIDE WHAT DAY ITALY AND NEW ZEALAND PLAY EACH OTHER!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH I WISH I COULD MOW DAN’S HEAD WHILE HE SLEEPS!!!!!!!

I AM ARTUR BORUC AND THIS HAS BEEN MY RAGE LIST. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! GOD BLESS!!!!!!

Definatly The Worst Miss Ever

I'm sure you all remember Dinamo Zagreb's Ilija Sivonjic. If not, then let me jog your short term memories.

I have previously written about Sivonjic before as he was the player who missed an open goal from three inches out. Remember him now.........Yep thought so.

Well it's time to forget about him and remember the next donkey who holds the title of 'Worst Miss Ever'.

Let me introduce Rocky Baptise.

I’m sure you all know that I'm not the most prolific goalscorer in the world but I’d like to think even I would have slotted this without too much trouble… !!!

Wow. I mean, WOW!

Take a bow, Rocky, you are now a non-league hero who just earned himself cult status for life.

The incredible miss occurred during Harrow’s recent game against Waltham Abbey (Harrow won 5-3).

Wow.

My 5 Funniest Videos On The Web Today

1) Here is a hillarious video which has been put together by talksport radio. Watch, laugh and enjoy.



2) Although this video is four years old. Is still manages to draw up a few laughs. Well done Carlsberg.



3)Don't we all just love the beautiful and accurate English language that Paul Merson provides us with every Saturday afternoon.



4)Here is an outrageous moment from Spain. During half-time in the game between the useless Xerez and the magnificant Barcelona a big, fat guy wobbled onto the pitch, scored a goal and bagged himself 480,000 Euros. Simple



5)Here is a British guy known has Mike at a football match. Apparently he is a legend in Kentucky, USA. So let's just see what all the fuss is about? Take it away Mike!